Whirling and whirling

Whirling and whirling
by Azly Rahman

whirling and whirling and whirling
i sometimes do not know what Time looks like any longer
like a bird of paradise that cuts across the raging clouds high above yonder
a simurgh on a long journey
across souls of the the universe that blunder and weep
across i passed spirits that have left the world down below
i have become the wind in the darkest night only
maddening raging parading clouds know
i have closed my eyes and let the souls in me argue furiously
which way to go
which way the wind should blow
whence my whirls of ecstasy should end
when i too know that there is no beginning
there is no end
i continue to whirl
till rumi and saadi and hafiz and hallaj silence me
till siddhartha and kabir and the sages accompanying isa pleaded for my sanity
till the minarets of istanbul pierce into my soul and let my spirit bleed
and soar
and awaken the universe entire
of my cries of neither joy nor sorrow
cries merely they must look like
as silent as a smiling derwish
never a perfection i wish to become
though perfect are the circles of my dances i have performed
the master and the slave i have become
you and i -- only breath
of a syllable of wide awaken drunkedness


whirling and whirling and whirling still
i have learned to smile a cynical smile
amazed at the world build as playground of hypocrites to triumph
amazed at the hatred amongst men that has permeated in even those who knows what love looks like
in my smile of a thousand despair for a world beyond repair
as if emotions in total chaos
my senses chant the song of hope to build these cages inside of me
to keep barbaric souls at he gate from crashing in
whirls and smiles i must become
my eyes weary from this journey of light and sound
of a dream and reality and these in contradiction so profound
i have smiled a thousand smiles
and loved a thousand times
and been loved a million more
in hope that this world will one day be safe and sound
and be back in the arms of those who only have love
as a way to triumph
i shall let my weary spirit soar
ascending the heights of illuminations and dark clouds marching in ferocious might
again i closed my eyes
only love will awaken me
with a gentle smile
and wash away the cynicism my lips hath learned to live by
whirling and whirling i am now
in the stillness of looking at only breath -- you and i