62] Malaysian Feminism in an Apartheid Nation

Malaysian feminism in an 'apartheid nation'
by Azly Rahman

I applaud any effort to advance the role of women in any society. All religious and secular systems promote this noble idea. In Malaysia it should be a struggle as enduring as lifting the multi-cultural poor out of abject poverty, the Indians in Malaysia out of discrimination, the deserving poor Chinese out of the exclusionary economic practice, and people with physical, emotional, biological and other kinds of challenges out of their ‘disabilities’. It should be as enduring as our common struggle to replace corrupt regimes that continue to create hidden and better systems of apartheid.

All of us - males and female and ‘transgendered’ beings - should become emancipators and not creators of systems of separate and unequal. Progressive Malaysian non-governmental organisations are doing an admirable job in the area of education of females. But lately there has been something deeply troubling about the way ‘Malaysian feminism’ (if indeed this idea exists and is ideologically visible as a struggle) is pushing itself to make itself heard.

I refer to the idea of ‘Malaysian feminists’ talking about the problem of inequality among between the sexes. I refer specifically to the claim that women are getting enslaved through marriage and that we are all living in a gender-based apartheid system. Is this claim justified and intelligent?

Some Malaysian feminists are beginning to allude to the idea that marriage is actually an institution of slavery. This gives us the idea that Malaysian men are slave-owners. This is a dangerous claim made by those who do not understand the true feeling of men. This claim is not only careless, emotional, unthoughtful but damaging as well. They come from those who perhaps do not wish or have the desire to get married or have no idea of the intricacies and complexities of family life in a dynamic and ever-changing society such as Malaysia.

Can we then conclude that Malaysian feminists who hold these views on slavery and apartheid are then children of slaves themselves?

"Men’s problems"

The idea that men are slave-owners in the institution of marriage is an outright provocation to the male specie. It is a devastating blow to the image of the ethical males who are living ethical lives. It is an idea derived from those who perhaps do not have children to take care of, and do not have the interest in men to cultivate in them. If the claim is made by the ‘Muslim feminist’ then it is akin to saying that the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) - by virtue of him being a husband - is also a slave-owner.

These ideas of slavery and apartheid are those coming from those who perhaps have had terrible experience not only with men but also with the male figure such as their fathers. It is not uncommon though if one theorises about feminism out of a terrible childhood. Freud had the experience. Many feminists in the West profess that they do not need men in fear of being institutionalised in this ‘apartheid system’.


Who gave Malaysian feminists the idea that wives are chained to the kitchen cabinet or the refrigerator? Don’t these wives go out to work, meet friends, go to the beauty salons, watch TV peacefully, go to KLCC, Mega Mall, and do things men do - while their husbands go out to work making money to meet the needs of the family? What a farce to claim that modern men are caging their spouses. It is actually men who have been enslaved by the economic condition designed by those who own the means of production and those who designed oppressive systems.

Men go to work leaving the wife and children safely at home and surrender themselves as indentured serfs into a system that demand them to have a lot of patience. Men get thrown daily into a system based on the philosophy of the pecking order and mentally-numbing bureaucracy created by those in power. Men toil daily - physically, mentally and emotionally - selling their labour to be turned into surplus value by those who own the profit-making institutions. Men had to endure hardship at work and maintain their jobs so that women - some of them - who stay at home can perhaps shop till they drop. Most often the demands made by wives are like commands made by masters on their slaves.

In general, out of respect for the feeling of women, men work harder to meet the material needs of the more demanding species. Hence oftentimes, while wives stay at home and watch soap operas, men play out the drama of office politics.

Wives these days, even those who stay at home in this ‘apartheid nation’ of ours are blessed with Indonesian, Filipino or Thai maids. Many do not need to cook. These maids/helpers are provided so that women can then be free to pursue their professional interest such as running a home-based business, taking long naps, doing social work, playing indoor games, or simply going shopping with friends. At their workplace, men had to maintain their cool even in the face of oppressive women-bosses who may behave like tyrannical slave-owners. To these women, the only way to be tough and to be the toughest feminist is to adopt a Bismarkian attitude towards management.

Many of these bosses behave like ‘Iron Ladies’ although deep inside they are marshmallows. Instead of managing others with feminine and motherly instincts, women in this case try hard to imitate men for the wrong reasons and for the misguided sense of leadership. Men must not be called slave-owners in order for these Malaysian feminists to make their truncated logic heard. Feminists are of course entitled to their own opinion.

But there are good feminists who also understand the condition of the modern Man in a system of cut-throat and dehumanising capitalist production. And there are bad feminist who do not know what they are talking about, out of the lack of experience with family relationships. Apartheid nation? Women in Malaysia are one of the most liberated in the world, contrary to the increasingly unpopular belief held by many confusing feminists.

Consider the following:

- How many women are in our universities?
- How many hold professional positions in virtually all sectors of our economy?
- How many work alongside men in making the most critical decisions that affect the most number of people?
- How many are in electronics factories working long hours assembling microchips for some robber-baron corporation from some global company that is collaborating with the Malaysian political elite?
- How many female Malay undergraduates are unemployed? - How many still refuse to yield to political power even if they have been there and abuse power and steal from the public coffers? - How many now populate Puteri Umno, Puteri Islam, Puteri MIC, MCA, DAP, etc and work side by side the Pemudas and Puteras of the political parties, in this ‘apartheid nation’ of ours?
- Are Malaysian women enclaved in our own bantusaan?

So, what are these feminists talking about when the issue is not primarily not of gender but of class and caste in the Malaysian economic system created by the ideology of developmentalism? What do the feminists want Malaysian women to be free to do? Do they wish to teach wives to think more about themselves and their individual freedom now, and be free from the more noble responsibility of raising their children?

If the wives start revolting for their freedom from ‘slavery in this apartheid system’, what would society look like then? In the process of asserting their rights not to get married (so that they will not been enslaved) will we have more unmarried-women-by-default? What then will society evolve into? A generation from now, will we have same-sex marriage? Will male also get fed up with women asserting their rights as feminists and hence embark upon their own same-sex marriage? Which state in Malaysian will be the first one to legalise same-sex marriage, as in Massachusetts, US? Will there be the idea of adoption by same-sex parents?

"Two misconceptions"

I do think Malaysian feminists are propping up a confusing argument on slavery and apartheid. It is not the issue of wanting to liberate women of gross injustices but their poor understanding of feminism means that is a problem here. Feminism is not about male-bashing. That would constitute female chauvinism. It is not about degrading the role of men in order to legitimise the calling of marriage ‘an institution of slavery’ and this gendered nation a ‘system of apartheid’.

There is much more to it that those two misconceptions. Changing social structures and hyper-modernity have created a complex matrix of beings among us in which the role of men and women can sometimes be blurred. The modern husband is must not be looked at as a slave-owner. He is capable of embodying virtues better than the best confused Malaysian feminist may embody. The virtue of such Malaysian feminist come from virtually no-experience with family life and child-rearing.

A liberated husband would be one taking Lamaze class or be in tune with the latest technique of birthing so that he will understand childbirth if not be willed to suffer from it. He will then be in the labour room waiting for his wife to deliver.

A liberated husband will then learn how to change diapers, sleep four hours a day until the child is big enough to stop yelling and screaming and kicking the playpen. He will take turns with his wife to endure this labour of love and relieve the latter of the challenges of child-rearing.

He will learn to spend time reading to the child, teaching him/her how to read, and play soccer - even though he comes back fatigued and battered by the oppressive and enslaving workplace run by a Bismarkian woman-boss.

The good man will also learn to cook - a trade reserved traditionally for women - for the sake of survival in this hyper-modern world of complex and changing roles.

The good man will also encourage his wife to pursue her professional interest and career, without thinking that professional success is the domain of the’“enslaving men’ alone.

The good man will play the role of the woman, perhaps much to the confusion of the Malaysian feminist.

I suggest Malaysian feminists be less blurry in their vision and instead embark upon the walk to freedom from slavery and apartheid by inquiring into the following national issues:

Feminisation of industrial labour
Prostitution of girls
Growth of the ‘guest relations officer’ industry
Strengthening of family institutions
Need to further intellectualise women
Fight against race-discrimination policies of the NEP that affect women
Reversing the trend of unemployed female graduates
Selling of ‘enslaving-image’ of women in the Malaysian media
Educating for awareness of women as partners in meaningful work
Building of the positive image of the ‘man’s role in the kitchen’
Teaching of the art of sharing of gender roles in child-rearing


Let us put a stop to male-bashing. It will get out of hand. Men are not slave-owners.

We are not an apartheid nation.